Dear Judy ,
hello how are you , interesting set of predictions except
i didn't understand a thing , yet end up laughing ........ happy new year to
all
----- Original Message -----
From: Judy Seigel <jseigel@panix.com>
To: <alt-photo-process-l@sask.usask.ca>
Sent: Friday, December 31, 1999 10:09 AM
Subject: Prediction
>
> Prediction for the year 2000
> ============================
>
> Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions,
> predictions are that Christmas and Hanukkah will merge. Industry sources
> say the deal had been in the works for nearly 1300 years, and at a recent
> press conference expressed confidence that the matter will be finalized in
> time for next December's festivities.
>
> While details are not yet available, the overhead cost of having twelve
> days of Christmas and eight days of Hanukkah becomes prohibitive for both
> sides. By combining forces, it is expected that the world will enjoy
> consistently high-quality service during the Fifteen Days of Christmukah,
> which is the projected name for the new holiday.
>
> There will of course be massive layoffs, with lords a-leaping and maids
> a-milking most likely the hardest hit, but obviously a small price to pay,
> in the words of one spokesman, for such a major advance. As part of the
> conditions of the agreement so far established, the letters on the dreydl,
> currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming
> unintelligible to a wider audience. Also, instead of translating as "A
> great miracle happened there," the message on the dreydl will be the more
> generic "Miraculous stuff happens." In exchange, it is believed that Jews
> will be allowed to use Santa Claus and his vast merchandising resources
> for buying and delivering their gifts.
>
> One of the sticking points holding up the agreement during the last three
> hundred years has been the question of whether Jewish children could leave
> milk and cookies for Santa even after having eaten meat for dinner. A
> breakthrough came last year, when Oreos were finally declared Kosher. So
> far all sides appear satisfied with this tentative resolution. A spokesman
> for Christmas, Inc., declined to say whether a takeover of Kwanzaa might
> not be in the works as well. He did however point out that, were it not
> for the independent existence of Kwanzaa, the merger between Christmas and
> Chanukah might run into trouble as an unfair cornering of the holiday
> market. Fortunately for all concerned, he said, Kwanzaa will help to
> maintain the competitive balance. He then closed the press conference by
> leading all present in a rousing rendition of "Oy Vey, All Ye Faithful."
>
>
> =======================================================================
>
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