Re: The Natural Order of Things

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From: epona (acolyta@napc.com)
Date: 08/29/02-03:28:00 PM Z


Not to get all mushy, but I felt similarly after a string of bad relationships.
Now I'm in a really good one, and I don't feel that way anymore. Rather I think
the gender separation is something we learn from society's teachings. Men are
constantly taught to be far more macho and to shut down emotions in fear of being
labeled sissies, and women are taught to be uber-feminine, constantly striving
for some ideal beauty in fear of not being loved by the same men. Both teachings
are destructve because they crush the opposite gender within us, that is very
natural to have, in fact, necessary to have, in order to be a whole and stable
person. That Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus crap is for the birds.

Whew,
Christine

William Marsh wrote:

> I see an enormous widening gulf between men and women, on just about any
> level you care to consider. It makes me wonder what the hell use it is
> for men and women to try to get together at all.
>
> Bill
>
> Katharine Thayer wrote:
> >
> > ARTHURWG@aol.com wrote:
> > >
> > > Just a thought, but isn't it possible that the power relationships between
> > > men and women are dictated by the "natural order of things"?
> >
> > Short answer: No, it's not.
> >
> > Longer answer:
> >
> > "O come and be my mate!" said the Eagle to the Hen;
> > I love to soar, but then
> > I want my mate to rest forever in the nest!"
> > Said the Hen, "I cannot fly,
> > I have no wish to try
> > But I joy to see my mate careering through the sky!"
> > They wed, and cried, "Ah, this is Love, my own!"
> > The Hen sat, the Eagle soared, alone.
> >
> > "O come and be my mate!" said the Lion to the Sheep;
> > "My love for you is deep;
> > I slay, a Lion should,
> > But you are mild and good!"
> > Said the Sheep, "I do no ill,
> > Could not, had I the will--
> > But I joy to see my mate pursue, devour and kill."
> > They wed and cried, "Ah, this is Love, my own!"
> > And the Sheep browsed, the Lion prowled, alone.
> >
> > "O come and be my mate!" said the Salmon to the Clam
> > You are not wise, but I am.
> > I know sea and stream as well;
> > You know nothing but your shell."
> > Said the Clam, "I am slow of motion
> > But my love is all devotion
> > And I joy to have my mate traverse lake and stream and ocean!"
> > They wed, and cried, "Ah, this is Love, my own!"
> > And the Clam sucked, the Salmon swam, alone.
> > ---Charlotte Perkins Gilman, 1899.
> >
> > I suppose for the literal-minded and historically uneducated I should
> > add that Charlotte Perkins Gilman was a famous feminist of her time,
> > and that the poem was meant to be ironic.
> >
> > By the way, what year IS this, anyway? When we've got people arguing
> > that the "natural order of things" dictates a power inequality between
> > men and women, and other people defending Freud, who not only was
> > debunked but was debunked DECADES ago, I have to wonder if I somehow
> > woke up in the wrong century this morning. Freud hasn't been mentioned
> > in psychology graduate programs, except as a cautionary tale of theory
> > unsupported by data, since the 50s. The only people who still take Freud
> > seriously are lit crit and art crit types, except for small holdout
> > enclaves of psychoanalysts that have no importance or influence in the
> > larger world. In addition, evaluations of therapeutic interventions have
> > found no appreciable improvement for people undergoing psychoanalysis,
> > even after years upon years of psychoanalytic treatment, (how much has
> > all his years of psychoanalysis helped Woody Allen, for example?) so in
> > my opinion it doesn't make any sense to give credence to Freud and his
> > notions. At worst they've done great harm (for example when women who
> > were being brutally assaulted by their husbands sought law enforcement
> > help but instead of the husband being brought up on charges the women
> > were sent to psychiatrists who told them that they were "castrating"
> > their husbands by defying the husbands' rightful authority over them and
> > going to the police, and that they should go back home and stop being
> > masculine and castrating and upsetting the rightful balance of power);
> > at best they've created a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing.
> >
> >
> > Katharine Thayer

--
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious.
It is the source of all true art and science.  He to whom this
emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and
stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed."
-Albert Einstein

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